The impact of choices made (or not made)

From The Last Psychiatrist I came across this recent post. He couches his post in terms of the recent economic implosion, and the effects that getting out of the market would have had on your investments, had you gotten out of the market during the five biggest days of each year. Instead of making an annualized return of 7% (which he says sucks), you'd almost be even money (worse suckage). Truly there are key, crucial points in time (i.e., decision points) that have unknown, significant long-term effects on us. Pro and con.

Then he goes on to talk about those points in time that, one way or the other, have had the most significant impact on ourselves. And I'm all like ... wow, that's sooooo like ... spooky. Because I just posted an article where I talk about a personal realization I've recently had, and about a story I'm writing, and they both involve choices made and circumstances, and ... well, you get the idea.

I have one very vivid "regret" about a choice not made at a certain point in my life, but if I can predict how that would have turned out, I think I made the best decision. Yeah, I wanted to tell a woman I was in love with her, and I didn't. Actually, I think it's better as fodder for another story. I put the word "regret" in quotes, above, because while it plays in my mind as a "what if I had told her ..." kind of thing. I think things have turned out and are evolving in pretty good, interesting ways today. Meaning, I don't at all regret the choices I have made.

I'm so glad I had the judgment and determination to follow through with my intuition. As I've told my wife, the good things that have happened are the direct result of good decisions we've made, and I give myself full credit for believing in my own good judgment and following through. We're on a path that was set in motion some time ago, and our successes are not completely by accident. Or by luck, either. We are making our own "luck."

But regardless, there are all those years I "wasted" by not focusing on the things that, not only was I good at, but that would have provided me truly significant personal satisfaction. And of course, I'm speaking of writing. Like I said: spooky-ish. But not really.

I have a personal philosophy not to spend time worrying about the past. I'm smart enough to realize I can't change the past, only learn from it, and once I've learned what I am able, to move on. I know I can affect the present, and plan for the future. Not every bad/missed decision turns out badly; most are just different. Who's to say what alternatives would have been better or worse? And I am not just rationalizing away my choices. Truth is, we have to live with the way things are--what is--and not what isn't or what could have been.

Except in fiction, but that's a post for another time. (Heh.)